In a previous posting, we saw that while all daoku is hokku, not all hokku is daoku. In the English language they are identical in form, but can be differentiated by content. Daoku is objective, while hokku can sometimes be more subjective.
Here is an example — a spring verse by Sodō:
宿の春 何もなきこそ 何もあれ
Yado no haru nani mo naki koso nani mo areDwelling ‘s spring what-too is-not at-all what-too is
Though quite cryptic in a direct translation, we can paraphrase it in English as:
My spring dwelling;
Though nothing at all is there,
All is there.
Now as you see, “my” is not included in the original — only implied.
Blyth translates it as:
In my hut this spring,
There is nothing, —
There is everything!
This is obviously a philosophical hokku, not an objective verse. It shows us the “thinking” of the writer. There is a place for such verses, and this one is often quoted because people find its paradoxical nature superficially very “Zen,” and some in the modern haiku movement have eagerly adopted the use of paradox in writing. It is not, however, suitable for daoku, which avoids subjective and philosophical comments, preferring to remain with the concrete rather than the abstract — with things and sensory experience rather than our ideas and musings about them.
That is why this verse is not useful as a model for daoku — an example of “all daoku is hokku, but not all hokku is daoku.”
We can clearly see the difference if we look at an objective spring hokku by Buson that is very appropriate as a daoku model:
燭の火を 燭にうつすや 春の夕
Shoku no hi wo shoku ni utsusu ya haru no yū
Candle ‘s flame wo candle at copy ya spring ‘s evening
Using one candle
To light another;
The spring evening.
It makes a very good daoku, because it gives us only the golden light of the candles in the shadows of the spring evening, as we see one used to light the other. It is very objective — experiencing, not “thinking.” It has a wonderful simplicity — ordinary things in ordinary words. In this lighting of one candle with another, we feel a deep, unspoken significance — and of course behind it all is the impermanence so important to the atmosphere of hokku.
Notice that an action is taking place, yet there is no “I,” “me,” or “my.” That enables us to focus on the action — on the sensory experience — without being distracted by the “self” of a writer.